Breakfast
by automatonic
Summary: Quatre's hungry! Now that I've gotten your attention, come on into the Gundam mansion and see what the frat boys are having for breakfast! Care for coffee, anyone?


Uh-Oh! Here we go again, getting ourselves stuck in another chaotic mess of random Gundam Wing clips! Believe me, people, this fic is no worse off than what I used to work with, stay with me now. 

So! Let's just see what our little G-boys cooked up today, ne?

Disclaimer: No little blond Arabians or coffeemakers were harmed during the making of this documentary into the secret life of what is know as 'The Breakfast Brigade'. Gundam Wing and its affiliates are in no way connected with my dinky little bank account, so don't sue me! I'm just a starving fan-girl, too!

"Breakfast"

[Morning in the G-boy white mansion. Quatre pads downstairs quietly in a soft bathrobe and slippers. The house is mute, the sunshine speaking in harmless melody. He smiles and glides into the kitchen. Tugging a box of cereal from the cupboard, he opens the lid and looks inside it curiously.]

Quatre: Fruit Loops…empty.

[He shakes his head and pulls out another box.]

Quatre: Cocoa Puffs…empty.

[His eyebrows go up, but it doesn't faze him. He reaches up and acquires another.]

Quatre: Cheerios…empty.

[Perhaps now he's seeing a disturbing trend…]

Quatre: Rice Chex…empty. Grape Nuts…empty. Cap'n Crunch…empty.

[He scratches his neck in befuddlement before moving onto the next cupboard.]

Quatre: Lucky Charms…empty. Raisin Bran…empty. Cinnamon Toast Crunch…empty.

[He peers apprehensively into the near-empty cupboard. Reaching in tentatively, he pulls out the final cereal box and gives it a good shake.]

Quatre: Golden Grahams…empty.

[Without another word he walks into the customarily crowded dining room. Heero, Duo, Trowa and Wufei are sitting at the long table with bowls piled high of every single breakfast brand imaginable. As tradition would usually have it in the G-boy's mansion, the morning paper has been terrorized and assaulted, now sitting barrenly in the center of the gathering. Duo has claimed the comics, Heero the front page. Trowa has the local news and Wufei, left with the rest, has chosen the sports section. Quatre purses his lips and leans against the door frame, seeing his comrades deep in premeditated innocence.]

Quatre: (sighs) I'm living with a bunch of cereal killers.

Duo: The Grape Nuts were already half gone, thanks to Heero here. So they don't really count as dead.

Heero: Pass the milk.

Wufei: Aw, damn. My marshmallow's are all soggy.

Trowa: Morning, Quatre. Want some toast?

Quatre: I was hoping for some Rice Krispies…

Wufei: Maxwell ate the last of it half an hour ago.

Duo: You snooze, you lose, blondie.

Wufei: Rule one when living with Duo the human vacuum.

Duo: Heh. Rule two, there's no such thing as a 'bad joke'.

Wufei: Except when _you_ tell it.

Duo: Hey!

Heero: Eat your cereal, both of you.

Quatre: So _now_ what?

Trowa: French toast?

Wufei: Some scrambled eggs?

Duo: Denny's!

Heero: NO.

Quatre: Oh, forget it. I'll just get a bagel.

Wufei: Maxwell inhaled those when he woke up.

Duo: Same to you, Chang-man! I believe you were just as hungry.

Quatre: Well - what about the eggo waffles?

Wufei: Them too.

Duo: Along with the jam.

Heero: And the rest of the clean knives.

Trowa: Not to mention the toaster.

Quatre…I can't believe this…

[The boys innocently eat their sugar-bombed cereals while keeping wary eyes on Quatre, who is rubbing his forehead in weary disbelief. He waves his hand and turns to go.]

Quatre: I - I guess coffee is a safe zone.

Wufei: Actually - 

Quatre: (snaps) What?

Duo: Nothing.

[Quatre huffs and stomps into the kitchen.]

Heero: He's going to find out.

Wufei: He wouldn't if _someone_ hadn't spilled the juice all over the counter.

Duo: Or _someone else_ hadn't cleaned it up with baking soda!

Wufei: Or a _certain someone_ hadn't decided it needed a BATH?

Duo: Well, I _thought_ it would help!

Trowa: Countdown in; 5…4…3…2…1…

[There is a squeak, then it turns into an angry roar from the area around the kitchen sink. Duo and Wufei duck instinctively as a putrid, burning smoke comes rolling out the doorway. Heero shakes his head and resumes reading the front page.]

Quatre: ALRIGHT! WHO'S THE GENIUS WHO PUT THE COFFEEMAKER INTO THE DISHWASHER??!!

---END

Poor, caffeine-deprived Quatre! Makes you almost feel sorry for the boys, huh? Well - almost. Anyway, hope you enjoyed your snippet of a visit into the lives of the G-boys inside their luxurious mansion! Come back soon and we'll have another adventure to cross-examine! But right now, I need to examine your reviews…hmm…WHAT?! I have none?! Get to crackin', people! If I hear some positives, I'll guarantee another fic! Woohoo!


End file.
